


Hum.

by charonhenson



Series: Singularity [3]
Category: It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
Genre: Body Horror, Implied/Referenced Dubious Consent, Psychological Horror, Surreal, let me know if i need to add any more tags idk how to categorise this stuff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-30
Updated: 2019-08-30
Packaged: 2020-09-30 14:34:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,477
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20448698
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/charonhenson/pseuds/charonhenson
Summary: No scheming, no grinding, just 500 bucks to participate in some drug trial. What could go wrong?





	Hum.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys! This is an (extremely late) follow up to my Charlie story- you don’t have to read it first as I feel this makes sense as a stand-alone, but it does give some scenes a little context. Enjoy!

500 dollars for one gig? These guys must be stupid. Dee snatched the flyer from the board outside the gas station bathroom- no fucking way anyone else was signing up and claiming her space.

Man, they didn’t even want her to do anything. No pictures, no contracts- just a trial run for some diet pill. Women only, too- it’s about time, right? 2 appointments, 2 weeks apart. Cake walk. Dee dialled as she pulled away. 

“Hey, uh- this the Royal Action... Royalactin, whatever. Yeah. Yeah I did. Dee Reynolds. Dee. Deandra, God, you deaf or something? Heh. Uh... Next Tuesday, sure. Okay.” Click. “Bozo.” 

She clicked her car lock once, then twice for good measure before heading into Paddy’s. Charlie was draped over the bar, staring blankly at his reflection in a brass tap. He hadn’t really been the same guy since that whole disappearing act Mac and Dennis pulled- thinking about it put a dry taste in her mouth. Frank was shuffling around, grumbling to himself. 

“You guys will never guess what I found.” Dee wrapped herself in a deep breath, lifting her arms to try and drive some energy into the air. The two men barely reacted. “This poster says I can get like, five hundred BUCKS for taking some stupid herbal pill. All I gotta do’s lie about that dumb heart attack I had. This girl is getting,” Dee wiggled her arms in what might have been an arm wave for someone with any coordination, “Moneeeeeeey, honeeeeeey!” She grinned, smug. Charlie suddenly slapped the side of his neck. 

“What, you guys don’t like it? Well too bad, cause you can’t join in anyway. Ladies only, losers-“ 

Dee is interrupted by Charlie vomiting down the front of his shirt and onto the bar. “JESUS fucking Christ, you animal! What the hell is wrong with you, are you gonna clean that up?” He’s dazed, focused downward onto his lap. Dee sprays him with the soda hose. “Get away from the bar, oh my GOD, where did you put the Lysol? Jesus Christ.” 

——

I HAVE READ THE FOREGOING INFORMATION AND HEREBY AGREE TO SUBMIT TO THE AFOREMENTIONED PROCEDURE. I HAVE HAD THE OPPORTUNITY TO ASK QUESTIONS AND MY QUESTIONS HAVE BEEN ANSWERED TO MY SATISFACTION. I UNDERSTAND THAT MY SIGNING OF THIS FORM HEREBY EXEMPTS ROYALACTIN™️ FROM ANY AND ALL CLAIMS OF NEGLIGENCE, MALPRACTICE AND CRIMINAL HARM. I UNDERSTAND THAT REFUSAL AT ANY TIME TO COOPERATE WITH TESTING PROCEDURES WILL RESULT IN WITHDRAWAL FROM THE STUDY AND REVOKING OF PAYMENT TO THE SUM OF $500.00. I CONSENT VOLUNTARILY TO BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH, BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH. 

Dee spun the pen on the table. It clattered to the floor as the door swung heavily open, shut. A nervous looking tech snatched her form away without making eye contact. Yikes. Homeopath types were weird at the best of times, but these guys were acting like scared little mice. She hoped this wasn’t some weird cult thing, she’d gotten involved in too many pyramid schemes for one lifetime. “Deandra Reynolds?” 

An older woman had the door propped open. She looked gaunt, jaundiced, with wide pitchy eyes. Her smile was sweet, if a little... greasy, somehow. Probably too much chapstick. 

“Would you please come through.” It wasn’t a question. 

Four other women and oddly, three men sat at some lab tables in the other room. This place was really leaning into the whole ‘mad scientist’ aesthetic. They all looked as unsettled as Dee felt, which was a little relieving. 

“Now that we’ve all settled in, I’ll begin our procedure. I’m sure you all read through our consent form thoroughly, so this will be your last opportunity to ask any remaining questions.” 

Dee raised her hand. “When do we get paid?” 

The woman wheezed out a weak attempt at a laugh before continuing. “You will receive your cash compensation at the end of the 2 week trial period.”  
Dee grimaced. “Anybody else? Good.” Three more techs entered, one pushing a silver tray with a row of hypodermic needles neatly lain out on top. 

“Hey I thought this was a pill, no one said anything about needles!” One of the men exclaimed. 

“With all due respect, you have all had time to have any questions answered. We will now be administering the supplements- this should be almost entirely painless.” Her smile glistened. 

A needle full of milky, opalescent fluid was jabbed clumsily into Dee’s shoulder. “Watch it, asshole!” The lead researcher kept her eyes on her. 

Once the sting was gone, the eight of them were unsubtly shoved out the door- all told to come back in 2 weeks time. A few of the women exchanged contacts with each other. Dee left as soon as the scientists let her, claiming to have better places to be. 

“That blonde, the pointy one- keep an eye on her.” The lead researcher murmured to one of the technicians. “She seems bolder- that should help her get ahead in the coming weeks.” 

“Yes ma’am.”

——

One week later, Dee feels- well, nothing. Or, not nothing. She feels good. Great, even. A little gross.  
She was sweating a lot more, particularly in her hands and feet. That wasn’t getting in the way if anything- no one was exactly leaping to hold her hands. Or her feet, ew. She’d turned a few heads in the street the other day though, and had been immensely proud of herself. 

No alcohol cravings. Or cravings for anything, really. She wasn’t even hungry. Despite not eating for totalling 3 days this week, she wasn’t any bonier than usual- actually, a few more stretch marks had popped up around her hips. Her form was more shapely altogether, just slightly enough for her to notice. Wider hips, broader chest. She admired herself in her bedroom mirror with a sense of apprehension, an odd thrill. 

——

Two weeks passed and Dee was back in the lab. Three of the women who had exchanged numbers last time were sat close together, as far from the other female participants as the table would allow. They looked pale and dehydrated, leaning into one another’s space and shooting agitated glances at Dee and the remaining woman. Dee frowned at the other’s hands, clenched into a tight little ball on the desk. Obviously gas station flyers were never going to attract a straight cut crowd, but this was still creeping her out.

Every one of the three men frankly looked disgusting. Man, these guys were wimps. One measly shot and they all get the shakes like little Victorian children. The one closest to her was positively green. Dee caught his eye as he sent a shy glance over to her. She smirked instinctively, which twisted into a scowl as his eye flickered over to the other woman. He continued to stare at her, and a faintly sweet smell tickled the room. 

“Alright, thank you all for your punctual return. I trust you are all well.” A technician smiled politely, apparently oblivious to the dishevelment of the people she addressed. “The saliva samples you all so helpfully provided upon your arrival are currently inconclusive. As such, a clause has been added to your contracts- you will all be asked to return to the facility in another two weeks in order to further observe your responses to the procedure.” Dee raised her hand. “Your compensation will be delayed until this time. However, to reflect our gratitude for your commitment the sum payment has been adjusted to 1000 dollars total.” Dee lowered her hand. 

“What if I withdraw now?” The fourth woman spoke up, voice strong yet reedy. The technician directed her saccharine smile to her. 

“I’m afraid you are all well past that option physically. Until the project is concluded, there is no way we would be able to flush the supplement from your body without serious risk to normal hormone function. If you still wish to withdraw your data from the study that is your choice, but your compensation will also be revoked as a result.” 

“Where’s the lead researcher?” One of the three women inquired waveringly. 

“Unavailable.”

A man with a sickly sheen on his top lip coughed. “I googled all this medical consent stuff you know, and you can’t legally deny us payment if we withdraw. Actually, you can’t do half the stuff you put in that contract.” Dee started fidgeting. Probably should have read more than half of that thing. 

The smile never budged. “We are a private company sir, and we are not listed as a medical facility. We look forward to seeing you in 2 weeks time.” 

——

“Where’s Charlie?” 

“He left earlier, saw him wandering along the street outside. Looked like he’d seen a ghost.” 

Maybe he saw Mac. Dee absently swiped a rag over the bar. Her fingernails, grown out to talon-like proportions, left fine scratches over the varnish. She tongued a sore edge to the corner of her mouth, felt a wet abrasion on the inside of one cheek, then the other. One more week till her thousand dollars. 

——

Traffic was a nightmare. Dee shoved her way into the building, not even bothering to lock her car. The appointment started 15 minutes ago-they were usually kept for 2 hours, but there was no fucking way she was letting them scam her out of her money by marking her absent. She tumbled through the door into the lab, then stopped abruptly. 

Whatever hell had broken loose in that room was confined to the centre. The table had been knocked over out of the way, the three women cowering behind it. Only one of the men was even there, and he looked half dead- he was sat clumsily on the tiled floor. His shirt was drenched in sweat. His pants and underwear were thrown away carelessly, leaving him completely exposed. The fourth women bracketed him to the floor with her thighs, leaning over him possessively as he blindly groped at her with limp hands. Dee could just see through the gaps of their legs that he was hard as a rock, though seemingly unaware of the state he was in. She hissed out of shock, and the other woman whipped round to face her. In a corner, a lab tech was frantically scratching notes onto a clipboard. 

The woman’s eyes were blown, whites yellowed and bloodshot. Her mouth hung open to an unnatural angle, fluid pooling over her lower lip and dribbling onto the man trapped below her. A silence swooped over the room as they regarded each other. 

“What the fuck?” 

A smell like burning sugar saturated the room. Dee abruptly felt her mouth start to water. 

The other woman stood from her crouch. A high thrumming tone rattled out from within her chest cavity, sounding out hollow against her ribs. She flared her nostrils, jaw still hanging sickly downwards. Aggression radiated from her in waves as she moved in Dee’s direction. 

Dee didn’t move, though some part of herself was screaming to. She felt a clicking hum tap the inside of her sternum, a wheezing pitch to answer the woman’s screech. Staring her down, Dee realised she hadn’t felt this good in years. This strong. The woman lunged. 

—— 

Lucidity returned in slow drags; warm sensation against her hands and up her wrists, cool tile against her knees. Red lines clawed against her arms, her face. That woman had tried to go for the eyes as Dee had pinned her down. She wasn’t getting back up again- Dee had torn her throat out, dug her nails in till she stopped gurgling. 

The man on the floor lay prone. Dee kicked at him sideways before noticing the stillness of his face. Even in death, he looked drawn and exhausted. 

“Cardiac arrest, I think. His body couldn’t take the strain of the mating drive.” 

A technician stood from their shelter behind the upturned table. The other participants still clung to each other, though now looking at Dee with awe rather than apprehension. 

“Where are the other two?” Dee asked hoarsely, wrestling to move her mouth the way she wanted. Her jaw kept dropping away from the rest of her face. 

“Both deceased, unfortunately. Such a waste, but we never expected everyone to take to it as well as- well, as you did.” The tech stepped gingerly over the man’s corpse, helping Dee to her feet. “Amazing, really- we thought she might have pulled ahead, emerged earlier. But Dr J insisted you’d come out on top, and she was right! All that raw,” she gestured at Dee’s ragged appearance, “aggression. Brilliant, just brilliant.” 

“I need another one, then.” 

“Another man, yes. You can have as many as you want. But one thing first.” 

The technician slipped through an unseen side door. Dee followed, expectations blank. The lead researcher is slumped on a propped bed, IV of straw coloured liquid leading into her hand. She grins as Dee comes into view, vindication spreading over her features. 

“I was right.” She drew a deep sniff into her chest. “God, she smells ripe.” 

“Yes ma’am.” The technician hugs her clipboard to her chest. 

“I suppose it’s time, then.” 

“Time for what?” Dee asked, though her voice was void of any urgency. The scientist shakes her head, strangely fond. 

“You should know by now, young lady. Let your body take you.”

The technician stepped back. Dee stepped forward. She grasped the older woman’s shin tentatively. 

“What happens afterwards?” 

The technician shuffled, looking out of the window. The scientist replied. 

“You’ve got this. You can do whatever you want, Deandra.” 

Dee felt something wet slide down her face. She pushed down on the older woman’s leg until she heard a snap. The woman kept smiling. She didn’t stop smiling until Dee broke her neck with no expression at all. 

——

Sunlight shone through the window, warming Dee’s squared shoulders. She caught sight of herself in the window pane, noted how her jaw hung low and unnerving. The fleshy abrasions either side of her mouth had widened into tears, scaly cracks running along her lips and onto her cheeks. Her eyes were glossy and dilated. She thought she might have recoiled at her appearance, another day. She swung the lab door open, stepped into the outside world. 

Her car was gone. Stolen, probably. Dee couldn’t bring herself to be angry. It all seemed so far away. 

Shouting and scuffling drew her gaze away from her empty parking space. Across the street, she spotted a group playing basketball- smelled the sweat rolling off of them. Fresh saliva welled in her mouth, mingled with the blood on her tongue. Every man there abruptly stopped their game, rigid, twisting their heads in her direction and visibly sniffing the air. She bared her teeth in a sharp sneer as they began blindly shuffling toward her.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading to the end! Let me know what you think x


End file.
